Friday 3 April 2015

EMOTIONALLY!!!

How many times have you heard someone say "People, Human beings, We, are creators of emotion not logic?" As many times as I have or more? I've often heard it said when talking about appealing to a person's emotional side, in order to empathise, influence, inspire or even getting someone to make a decision. The right decision for them.

So I read this post on facebook and I shared it too. It resonated, made sense. But then it got me thinking and that gets me writing.
"Don't let your emotions distract you from what needs to be done. Control your emotions or your emotions will control you"
Again! I totally get it. I'll give you an example.
You know those days where you just have one thing after the other going pear shaped (Translation - very wrong) but you manage to keep your eye on the ball, you keep the main thing, the main thing. You manage not to get distracted, or to give in to the urge to just scream and shout or freak out. You really don't even have time for it today. Plus you know it's totally counter productive Right!! Right!!
But who can keep that up all the time? And doesn't all that energy, that emotion have to be released somewhere, sometime, aimed at someone?
You've seen that too, I'm sure. The moment when someone just lets you have it, full barrels and you know full well it has nothing to do with you. You're just there when the implosion hits. A case of wrong place, wrong time.
Speaking for myself.  Most of the time I'm positive, optimistic, calm and solution conscious. Other times I just let my B**CH out and let her rip.

The thing is both emotional control and emotional release feel great. Sometimes!!

A few weeks back my phone got grabbed by some guys on a moped while I was on my way to a meeting. I still went to my meeting, talked to really unhelpful police and equally unhelpful mobile company and, and and..... the day got worse.
I kept myself  calm and stayed solution conscious and that felt GOOD!

A few months ago working at an event and a special person (rude, obnoxious, so and so) came along and gave me grief, I let him have it! Briefly!!! And I'm telling you, that   felt GOOD!!
Now that I think of it I needed hugs and a friendly ear after both emotionally charged situations.

Side Note! I really believe there are no simple black and white right and wrong good and bad there are colours and shades and hues to infinity.

My take on the whole thing is simply this, be true to your feelings. Honor them but be mindful who's in control, You, or Your emotions?  Be it fear, love, doubt, anger, faith..... who's in control?

                                      
                                      And of course it's not that simple! Or is it?

I have a 7yr old boy aka cub and I teach him that he controls him. That no one makes him feel anything. He gives meaning to the situations and peoples behaviour towards him. In my mind he might as well know this from now.  It's not so easy though, when he comes home upset.



He doesn't want to do his after school club anymore. Some of the kids laugh at him cause he missed a goal or made a mistake.  He doesn't wanna hear me go on about "you control you" stuff, he wants to express that he feels bad about it.

He wants to be emotional. I tried to tell him that he shouldn't stop doing something he likes to do because of the actions of others. That he decides how it makes him feel. He wasn't hearing me. At that point I just had to listen and comfort him, as it wasn't the time to re-enforce a life lesson.  He just wanted to feel what he was feeling and I decided to honor that.  Oh! and not to mention stopping myself from getting pissed off at those little brats upsetting my cub. Such is life. So much to learn so much growing to be done. So stay true to you and how you feel! We are emotional beings after all Right??!!

Keep on growing!!! #learnsharegrow

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